If you can, imagine living in a deep dark hole that is surrounded by four dark, gloomy walls you can start to see what depression is like, but you dont know the half of it. You can see the top way up there. You know its there because you can see a little shimmer of sunshine. Your goal of the day used to be to climb out and feel the warm healing heat of the sun on your face.
As time passed and you are in your pit the desire to escape lessens with every heartbeat. Yet, you still mange to do some of things that are accepted of you, but you know at any moment you will be dragged back down into your dark and gloomy hell. After awhile you feel safe there. Its comfortable and you know whats accepted of you. Your expectations are nothing. While youre in your hole you can cry, feel sorry for yourself, and be frighten. This is what you need to feed your depression.
The real hard part is if you are lucky, and the people in your
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